By Maurice Johnson          

-“He scared inside he scared outside”-Family guy turtle and hillbilly cutaway

Many of us like this animated turtle from this random thought included in one of my favorite animated shows Family Guy, are scared turtles afraid of the inside of themselves as well as the perceptions from the outside world. We have trouble being alone with our thoughts and we also have trouble living up to, accepting, or being our true selves in public. That shit is just stressful. Having to put on for people everyday then going home to finally let out that fart you may have been holding in forever just because you didn’t want to inconvenience the girl or guy you met on bumble can get pretty annoying after a while. This is because there is no freedom in this at all. Because we haven’t gone inside of ourselves and truly accepted who we are as a person we feel the crazy need to keep our masks on and airtight especially when meeting a new intimate prospect. Nah you can’t possibly be your full unapologetic self in front of her because she’s hot all the way down to her perfect toes that you assume are in her shoes designated for the “coffee shop meet-up.” If we were to go within and deal with ourselves accordingly and spend more time figuring out who we are as individuals in full, then perhaps we wouldn’t have to stress being “perfect.” We could accept that our default setting isn’t to hold the door for the lady but we walk closer to the street than she does. We could accept that we don’t open the door for the driver after getting in the car first, but we perhaps offer to at least leave the tip at dinner. If we go inside ourselves first, we can actually show some semblance of bravery and perhaps even some comfort with the people with whom we interact with because we understand that we are just sharing our story with another. We are sharing our art of life with another artist. (*DMR) Sitting with your own thoughts can also provide a ton of insight on how you see things and also how you decide to deal with living in general. You can begin to actually ask real questions about yourself and begin an exciting quest with your dad, bodyguard and your Indian friend into the wonderful world of, WHY. (Extra points if you can get the previous reference) This question is one of the most loaded ones in history but we often run away from it and it holds many great treasures.

            We run away from the question of “Why” at times because it reveals so much about who we are and what we hold dear and what we value. When your why is questioned, the answer is not so cut and dry if you totally mean it and it can also attach to the answers you give therefore forcing you to feel and think. And with feeling and thinking we often don’t like to do it when it’s prompted or forced because let’s face it, it’s mad uncomfortable. This discomfort may sometimes come from the internal judge based on the assumption that the person asking or even yourself, is judging you based on your answers. What we have to learn how to do in this case, is take the “Why” not as a question that needs to be answered by law but take it as a chance at adventure. Take it as an opportunity to learn more about who we are as individuals as well as see it as a chance to seek our individual purposes. The concept of seeing “Why” as an adventure was something I personally developed after reflecting on my life as a whole, and something I put into practice after experiencing a really rough patch in my life. But that’s another story for another time. But in order to see “Why” as an adventure question requires yet another thing that’s uncomfortable. It involves letting go of the so called notion that you have to know what your “Why” is at the moment. It involves you not knowing and being ok with doing things until it comes to you like taking action…. Just as long as you don’t go out becoming Michael Myers in search of it. Let’s hope that that doesn’t come to you in your magical journey of “Why.”

Despite the case of not knowing the “Why” of your life, it is important to know that our inside holds the key to opening up our lives and living in a way that allows us to live and be free in the trinity. (Mind, Body, Spirit) Therefore, leading to the exploration of our individual adventure question. The best way to stray away from being the “Scared turtle” is to go within a little bit at a time. Over time the more you practice doing this, you’ll be ok with going into your shell without all of the screaming in fear, leading to less comments by slightly insightful hillbillies. (I’m sure there are very smart hillbillies out there).   

“An elevated soul is an excellent soul”

Maurice Johnson